Forgiving the past:
Ghazal Omid
Author of the book Living in Hell,
Ghazal Omid currently lives in Canada. Having lived through turmoil in Iran, Ghazal made a decision to move to Canada. After years of bottling up her story, she finally decided to write about her experiences. Below is our conversation with her:
PersianMirror: Tell
us about a little about yourself.
Ghazal Omid: I was born in Abadan, Iran, on the Persian Gulf just minutes from the Iraq border. I was the youngest of eleven siblings, many of whom I don't even know. I am the only daughter of four children by the second of my father's two wives. We were, at times, both rich and poor. My father was a wealthy businessman who neglected both of his families. He abandoned us all to hide in the US to esca pe the danger of the revolution. He was a man with dark secrets. When he married my mother he did not mention that he had another wife and seven kids in his hometown or that he had left that town after raping his own sister, who died as a result of the rape.
When I was four years old, as tension grew between Iran Iraq, my family moved to Isfahan in central Iran.
As a child, I was sexually molested by two boys at kindergarten and by an adult brother at age nine and again, for a year, at age thirteen; leading me to attempt suicide. I hid the molestation for thirteen years before writing about it in my book. I believe I am possibly first Iranian women to openly write about this horror, which, although common, is a taboo subject in my culture. I was helpless. I was afraid my mother would not believe me and might even kill me in an honor killing.
I have been interested in history and politics since I was eight years old. Instead of playing with dolls and toys, I read the news and questioned my mother about our country's history and future. I saw and lived the Islamic revolution up close and, even at that age, questioned Khomani's motives. I survived the eight-year Iran/Iraq war despite our home being located in a primary target area for Iraqi bombers. We were surrounded by death and destruction every day and nearly starved in our unheated home in winter.
I started religious studies at age seven, reading both the Koran and the Bible. My abusive life caused me to lose my faith in God at age thirteen but it was restored by my pilgrimage to Mecca at age fourteen.
I graduated high school as the war ended. My curriculum was aimed at medical school but, even though I had high scores on entrance exams, I was denied enrollment in medical school or any public university because of my record in high school of non-conformity to the regime's arbitrary non-Islamic rules. Despite limited finances, I enrolled in a private university and studied French Literature to prepare for a law degree. At university, I continued low-key defiance of the indefensible dictates of the government mullahs. I was continually watched and harassed by faculty spies and was abducted from the street by the secret police. I escaped, temporarily, by jumping from the kidnapper's speeding car into a busy street. I was seriously injured but was rescued by the crowd who drove off my captors. Although I was the victim, I was rearrested and avoided prison on trumped up charges, which typically resulted in a rapid death sentence, only by agreeing to non-disclosure and signing away my rights to pursue the case. Despite the agreement, I took advantage of bureaucratic inefficiency and carried my case to the Supreme Court of Iran where it was dismissed as a ‘ misunderstanding '.
PM: Can
you tell us a little about why you wrote the book and what you hope to achieve with it?
GO: After I signed the document saying that the kidnapping never happened; as I walked out of that horrible prison where I had witnessed the pain and suffering of other equally innocent people, I vowed that I would write this book to tell the world about the real Khomani and not the saintly image he portrays on TV.
My mission is to inspire and free legions of women from virtual slavery imposed by society and to encourage the world to take an active role in displacing a regime that preaches a perverted message of Islam for personal agendas.
Abuse of children and women is very common in our culture. Unfortunately, it is well hidden because some is practiced as either religion or cultural celebration. As a former victim of this kind of abuse, I know how it feels and how it must be stopped. I am probably the first Iranian woman to stand up and say enough is enough. We need to value and respect women more than just words and little girls must be protected. I hope I have started a mission and I that won't be the last. PM: Tell us about the reaction you have had so far from readers.
GO: The over whelming majority of the fan mail I receive is favorable. Some is from people who have shared my ordeals and are inspired and encouraged by my story. Most are surprised and alarmed by the truth of the condition in which Middle Easterners live and want to know how they can help.
Most of the response has been from US and Canada is picking up. However, a surprising amount as come from abroad, especially the Middle East and Europe.
I constantly receive threatening hate e-mail in the genre, “God will send you to the devil and you will roast in hell.” My response is, “I'll be sure to pay you a visit.” I established my website, www.livinginhell.com, not just to promote my book but also my cause—the liberation of Iran. The Iranian government is retaliating by denying Iranians access to my website and succeeded in temporarily shutting it down completely
PM: What are some of the upcoming projects you have planned for the near future?
GO: I will appear on Persian TV and Radio shows in California, Feb 19- 26, 2006, to make speeches and have a book signing. With the help of other active Iranian women, I am starting an organization in the United States to help Iranian women and young girls from all around the world find the courage to stand up and speak out about their abusers.
I am chairing a conference on Women and Human Right in Michigan in early March 2006. I will be exhibiting at BookExpo in Washington DC, May 19- 21, 2006.
I look forward to seeing our people to stand up to the abuse, whether it is cultural, political or done in the name of religion. If we simply endure the abuse, keep quiet and wait for a hero, that hero may never come. There is a hero in each and every one of us. We all are heroes.
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